You’ve finally got your baby to go to sleep. You carefully lower them into their moses basket like they’re an explosive. You hold your breath as you take a tiny step back, and then boom, their tiny arms fly up and theyre staring at you. They’re screaming bloody murder and the only place they will actually sleep is in your comforting arms.

Welcome to Contact Naps.

While it can feel frustarting when you want five minutes of peace without a baby attatched to you, contact naps are incredibly normal, especially during the newborn stage. I remember the early days with Ozzy where he never napped not touching somebody.

What Is A Contact Nap?

A contact nap is precisely what it seems like- a nap where your baby is making physical contact with a person while they sleep. It may be in your arms, on lying on your chest or even in a baby carrier.

The moment you attempt to lay them down on their own, they often wake up and want to be held again.

Why Do Babies Like Contact Naps?

1- They feel safe
A contact nap can replicate the environment your baby was in while still in the womb. For 9 months they lived somewhere warm, dark, noisy and always moving.

Every movement you made, your voice and your heartbeat, they always felt secure and were never alone.

Suddenly theyre born nd it’s bright, cold and quiet. You want to lay them down to get on with jobs but it’s so far away from what theyre accustomed to.

Sleeping on you feels familiar. It smells safe, you’re warm, they can hear your heartbeat and feel your chest move up and down with each breath. It helps them to feel secure.

2- They haven’t learned how to self settle
Babies aren’t born with the ability to self sooth, they dont know how to relax enough to fall asleep on their own.

They use you to calm down enough to fall asleep- this isn’t a bad thing, it;s just how babies are.

3-Your Body Regulates Theirs
Being close to you can help to regulate your baby’s breathing, heart rate and body temperture. Skin-to-skin contact has also been shown to reduce stress and promote bonding.

4-They’re in Light Sleep
Babies spend much more time in active sleep (this is light sleep) than adults do. During this stage they can wake incredibly easily.

When they are lying on you, they often settle back to sleep much more easily than if they’re alone.

Are Contact Naps Bad?

Absolutely not.

One of the biggest myths that new parents get told is that holding your baby will “spoil” them and create bad habits, making a “rod for your own back”.

This is totally untrue you cannot spoil a newborn baby by responding to their need for comfort.

As your baby grows up their nervous system matures, they often grow out of their need for contact during sleep. This can take longer for some babies but is normal.

My Experience

Ozzy absolutely loved contact naps during his first few weeks home. He’d sleep okay in his moses basket at night but refused to be put down during the daytime.
I spent many hours nap trapped with him peacefully curled up on my chest. And if I dared to put him down to grab a drink or go to the toilet he’d scream- making me think I was doing something wrong.

Now I realise he just wanted to be close to me to feel safe.

Now Ozzy will mostly sleep on his own, and I’ glad I enjoyed those lazy sofa naps with him. However, some days he still decides he can only feel safe on me- which is normally fine, although recently I needed to clean the house for guests and had to call in my mother-in-law as cuddle reinforcement.

How To Make Contact Naps Easier

1- Get Comfy
If youre going to be trapped for as long as your baby naps for you need to make sure you’ve gathered everything you need before they conk out on you
• A drink
• Snacks
• A phone charger
• The TV remote
• A book/ headphones

Once they have fallen asleep the last thing you want to realise is everything you need is just out of arms reach. And maybe run to the toilet before you plop down.

2- Accept that some jobs aren’t critical
You may feel guilty that the pile of laundry grows ever larger, or the dishes are still on the counter while you’re trapped under a sleeping baby.

however you baby won’t need your body to sleep forever and you can always come back to the chores.

3-Baby wear
If your to do list is sky high and your baby wil tolerate being in a carrier or sling, one way to overcome contact naps is to baby wear.

This gives your baby the safety and closeness they desire, while allowing you to move and not be trapped in one position.

Ozzy has spent mny hours strapped to my chest while I fold washing or clean the kitchen.

4- Take turns
If you have your partner, family or friends that are avaliable take turns to cover nap duty.
This gives you time to do your chores, shower or just have a few minutes to yourself.

When Do Babies Stop Wanting To Contact Nap?

Every baby decides this at a different periods. Some are very quick to independently sleep- finding sleeping on another person to be disruptive. Other babies want to contact nap for months- there is no developmental period or “right” age where they stop.

Most babies stop needing to be touching when they mature  bit, become more aware of their surroundings and are able to link together their sleep cycles.

Should I Try Prevent Contact Naps?

This is entirely based on you. If you are happy to contact nap with your baby, keep doing so until your baby decides they are ready.

If it isn’ working for you and your lifestyle you can gradually introduce cot naps, starting with one a day and working up to all naps being independant. This can take a long time with some days baby going down for naps super easily and others being a total nightmare.

With Ozzy depending on what I have going on I’ll either try and pop him down or just relax and take the lazy hour or so he wants to sleep.

Contact naps can be exhausting when you desperately need a cup of tea or the toilet. They can also be some of the quietest, most peaceful moments you’ll spend with your baby.

One day they’ll be too busy crawling, walking and exploring to fall asleep on your chest.
So while it’s perfectly okay to wish for a little more freedom, it’s also okay to enjoy those cuddles while they last. One day your baby will need you to sleep and the next day they can do it themselves and neither of you will realise it’s the last one.